IT'S A PANDAN LIFE ...!

Whenever you're in conflict with someone, there is one factor that can make the difference between damaging your relationship and deepening it. That factor is attitude. ~ William James. A recent row with Muse reduced me to tears. It also taught me a lot of things.   1) Never, ever assume what the other thinks.  Sometimes texting is not always the best way to communicate, especially when you need to plan things urgently. There's that tendency to read too much between the lines and filling in the blanks with your emotion rather than rational thinking. Just pick up the phone and call. 2) Accumulated pet peeves have the tendency to get articulated one by one during a row, which is not a bad thing. It  is a good thing, I think, albeit a shocking one, considering Muse is quite a reserved person and often keeps things to himself. Otherwise I'd never hear these pet peeves and therefore keep on hurting him. I should take note that when Muse did this, I jus...

I miss those texts... that made me smile at odd times of the day that asked me what I’m doing this weekend that accompanied me during those boring journeys that got rid of my doubts. I miss those texts... that asked me what I think of your choices that  told me you're done with the things you enjoy most that asked me to listen to you that brought us to the inner you. I miss those times when texting was just so effortless yet so jitteringly meaningful. Relationships are harder now because conversations became texting, feelings became subliminal messages online ~ Anonymous

I know I think. Does this cow or that tree knows it? ~http://philosophy-of-doctors.blogspot.com/2009/10/quoting-my-own-quotes.html   Time flew so past and now it's April. You don't think you've done anything significant so far. But you've learnt a few significant things. 1. Doing a PHD is like trying to balance on a tight rope, with no interested audience. A genius somewhere said this. You totally agree! 2. Your level of tolerance for humour has significantly decreased; at times you find yourself severely suffering from humour-deficiency. PHD-induced, is all you can say. 3. When you hit rock-bottom (PHD-induced), it is much better to talk it out with someone who is undergoing or has gone through the same ordeal. Only fellow travelers on the PHD trail would understand what you're talking about. Those not on the trail would have no inkling of what you're talking about and they probably don't care anyway. 4. It's good to keep...

If only I had a garden. I'd plant these flowers until I'm blue in the face.     Hydrangea. Bunga tiga bulan , in Malay. Reminds me of baby blue. And babies in general. And UK. Peonies. No Malay word for it. This flower just reminds me of the Far East. Azalea. I like these flowers because of the name. No Malay word for it. Reminds me of Holland, too.        Tea-pink rose. I only like this type of rose. Not pink, but tea-pink. No Malay word for it. Maybe  Mawar merah jambu teh ? White orchid. This flower screams elegant and Oriental to me. Orkid putih .  Tuberose. Bunga sundal malam . Despite the provocative Malay name, I like the smell a lot. Plus, it's a bit phallic. Hahaha. I don't know what this is called.  I call it " Bunga tepi jalan ". These flowers somehow remind me of my childhood. They were pretty abundant during those days.  When you have only two pennies left in the world, buy a loaf of...

I had many reasons to be happy when 2012 kicked off. First, I lost 5 kg (at the time of writing this though, I'd lost 6 kg...) Even though this pic is not very clear, I like the silhouette of my body. It is a testament of my hard work losing 5 kg. My whole life I've never, ever gone on a diet. I like this pic very much because I looked really happy (I was happy, anyway). Plus, I think my arms look leaner (result of weight-lifting at the gym). Dieting coupled with exercising yielded a better result, definitely.  Second, I’m done with Chapter One of my thesis (all 140+ pages of it). Yeeha!!! Third, I wasn’t alone on the eve of New Year’s Day. I was crooning at the top of my lungs with a good friend in Johor Bahru until the clock stroke midnight! Fourth, I was in Singapore for a whole-day trip on New Year’s Day, a trip that made one of my dreams come true. Hint: Keroncong. What 2011 taught me was, it really sucks to be alone on New Year’s Eve and on Ne...

Framing 2011. Accompanied by my favourite pics. A picture speaks a thousand words, remember this old adage? What I managed to do in 2011: 1. Keep on working on my PHD. I guess I managed to do this. I spent the whole year writing up about more or less 40k words. I’m a bit slow in writing, I realized. I worry too much. I realized a bit too late too, about the feasibility of Marxism in my area of study – so spent the last 3-4 months of 2011 reading, framing and cursing the theory. Nevertheless, I now revere Marx and Engels for their insightful and practical inquiry. And thanks to all the readings I’ve done (not only on Marxism), I find that I’m more attuned to my own culture, my country and how these have evolved. I’ve never felt more patriotic than now. The tanah air that I’ve known is never corrupt, it’s those at the helm that are corrupt. 2. Put on more weight (and then lost some). I did do this. I ballooned up as a result of my trip to UK. I couldn't ...

Muse: The last time I ******, I left the States and came back to Malaysia. Now, where shall I run to? I'll leave for Indonesia, then! *Amused tone, probably joking* Me: *Thinking: 1. If he got a penny for every time he said he wanted to leave (he uses many variations of the word e.g. run, migrate), he'd be a millionaire now. 2. My heart stops every time he says he wants to leave - the ruthless manner in which the word is uttered sent icy-cold jolts to my heartstrings. 3. I don't think he is aware that the word is associated with loss. When someone leaves, either by death or by choice, it is a  great loss to the people who care about him/her.   4. I'll probably lose my cool the next time he utters the word (or its variations).*