Bring It On, 2010!

No one ever regarded the First of January with indifference. It is that from which all date their time, and count upon what is left. It is the nativity of our common Adam. ~Charles Lamb

Another year whizzed past! Looking back, I’m proud of some the things I managed to accomplish despite being Bath-deprived. Those who know me well would know that this deprivation has got nothing to do with a bath. The damage to my ego was incalculable. However, I managed to accomplish a few things this past year, which served as balm to my long-suffering, bruised ego:

1. I managed to publish in an international journal! It was really a feat considering I never dreamed I’d be able to publish in an international journal. I've published here and there, but never in an international journal. I’m so grateful to have a mentor at work who’s always willing to guide and share. I owe this to her, really.
2. I got a better score for my teaching evaluation, it’s gone up a few notches, thanks to my kids. It really meant a lot to me! Hard work put into preparing for classes has paid off. What the kids think about your teaching style can truly matter, eh?
3. Another significant achievement was when I got involved in teaching supervision for the first time, something I’ve always wanted to do for a long time. The fact that I was able to share my teaching experience with those teacher-trainees was liberating and rewarding. There’s also something exhilarating about going to schools, seeing those adorable playful kids and being mistaken as the new teacher in school a few times, in the process. Hehehe. I was also transferred back to the time when I was a school teacher (many moons ago) each time I stepped into a school compound (I went to six schools, altogether). Oh well, I guess the older you are, the more nostalgic you become. Can’t be helped.
4. I’ve picked up cooking and baking again. After a long hiatus. This past semester break, I tried so many old and new recipes, local and international. But my favorite was the cupcakes. I'm a sucker for cupcakes, anyway. I’m so glad those babies turned out well. I used to bake cakes and muffins but never cupcakes.
5. I let my guard down and revealed my feelings to my muse. I have never, ever done this before, seriously. I might be wiser (older) now but there are quite a few things that I haven’t done. This was one of them. In the past, I was so used to having guys tell me they liked/were attracted to me but not the other way around. I’ve never been the type to approach a guy first, no matter how much I admire him. But then, there’s always a first time for everything, eh? It was a nerve-wrecking task, further complicated by my fear of rejection (and heart palpitations), but I did it anyway. It was liberating, really. I told myself that this is hardly the Victorian age, this is the postmodern age. I don’t think it’s improper for a woman to approach a guy or to tell a guy that she likes him. In my case, I needed to know. You could say that my curiosity was working overtime. My heart felt over-stretched, too. Moreover, I didn’t want to waste my time and energy admiring, liking, thinking, daydreaming etc. for a guy who couldn’t care less about me.

Oh well, now that the new year has ushered in, I’ve decided to get out of my Bath-deprived melancholic phase. Bath is history now and shall be buried in the deepest recesses of my heart. I now have a to-do list to keep me motivated. You can call it my new year’s resolutions. A lot of people say they don’t have new year’s resolutions but that’s crap, that’s becoming a cliché, really.

1. Despite the crappy, rigid regulations and bans imposed by the university, I’m just gonna be oblivious to them and carry on with my teaching and research. I’m also going to apply for that promotion though I become suicidal everytime I think about the shit I have to go through just to put in my application. I’ve never understood why I have to apply for a promotion. Shouldn’t it be awarded rather than applied? Oh well, I’ll just put in an application even though it’ll take ages to do so. My form-filling phobia will escalate, no doubt. There’s also a possibility that I won’t get it but I wouldn’t be surprised. Post-Bath, just be prepared for another let-down by the over-zealous, over-ambitious university.
2. I’m also going to apply for my PHD in local universities, which I’ve put on hold for so long. I’ve been terribly motivation-challenged for the past year, it’s time for a wake-up call. I’ve now come to terms with the fact that a PHD is a PHD, no matter where you go to get it.
3. Since I plan to go on a study leave this mid-year, I’m determined to transform my study at home. My study is a study by the looks of it but I rarely, rarely use it since I have had no reason to even be in it but I’m determined to transform it into a real study now, internet-connected, in line with my plan to do my PHD (and also to work at home whenever I don’t feel like working in the office). We’ll see. Uh, I feel giddy already thinking about the transformation. It’s going to be fun! But I’ll probably end up broke. There’s that almost 7-year-old lap top that needs to be replaced. I need to get a printer, too. And an internet line. Oh-oh. *Grimace*
4. I need to buckle up on my reading. I’ve been slacking due to my preoccupation with a lot of things. Work. Korean movies. Gym. Cooking. Baking. Since I’ve bought a lot of short story collections lately, I vow to read at least one short story per day. I repeat, one short story per day. Wait, who am I repeating this to?
5. I’m so tired of living alone. I need a witness to my already advancing life, period. But of course, I can’t be overly optimistic about this. I keep on recycling this resolution every year without fail. *Grimace*

Well, anyways, I’ve got a lot of things lined up for me this new year and I’ve never been more positive. 2010, thy shall bring it on and God’s will be done!